Recently in rants Category

Someone actually said to me today, "Rob, I would like you to introduce your fist to my face."^{[ * ]}

Being the cautious type, I was hesitant to make the introductions, but the fellow was really quite persistent. So great was his persistence in fact, that I almost gave in.

"Believe me ____ [name redacted]," I said to him, "my fist is also quite eager to make your face's acquaintance. However, I really don't think it would be appropriate to put them together at the moment. Maybe some other time?" He agreed, though rather reluctantly.

So in the end no introductions were made, though I would be less than truthful if I said that no pang of regret was felt for having passed on the opportunity.

^{[ * ]}Okay, so he didn't use those exact words, but that is the gist of what he was saying.

I've never considered myself racist, but I recently realized that there is one race that I truly despise: the human race.

I really just can't stand people. When ever something really pisses me off, it can almost always be traced back to at least one person.

I get on the train in the morning and they're all over the place, getting in my way, being loud and stupid, and just generally being a huge pain in the ass. I won't even go into the 8 to 9 hours that I'm at work. On the train going home, it's the same shit; sometimes worse depending on what time I leave.

I just can't get away from people. They're the most persistent parasites on the planet.

Here we have a still frame of Sarah Palin from the RNC, supposedly striking a Hitler pose. There are two things that irritate me about this:

1. It's probably taken out of context. Maybe she was making a sweeping gesture, and this single frame shows her arm at the top of the arc. Maybe she was waving and in this picture it looks like she is making a rather unfortunate gesture.
2. There are plenty of legitimate reasons to criticize her. Pointing to this and saying "OMG shes nazi!!!11" is sensationalistic bullshit.

This news is almost a month old now, but I just saw it a few minutes ago:

You know that mega-bombad 9-disc Ultimate Star Wars Saga box set that's been in the works for a few years now? The one that was expected to be released later this year to celebrate the 30th Anniversary? Yeah... maybe not so much anymore. We've been hearing from multiple sources now that the folks up at Lucasburg were surprised enough at the lackluster sales of last year's Star Wars Trilogy DVD re-run ("Now with Han shoots first!") that they're afraid they might have gone to the Sarlacc Pit one too many times, so to speak. There's talk apparently that the box set could get delayed a year or two to amp up demand for the films on disc again. Don't know how serious this all is, but that's the word that's blowing in the wind.

Stupid bastards. I'm not buying the DVDs again until they release anamorphic, hopefully remastered transfers of the original, non-Special Edition trilogy.

Today's word of the day at Dictionary.com:

gastronome: a lover of good food and drink.

Oh ok. I've heard of that before, but it was called by a different name. What was it again... Oh! I remember now! It was called "being a fat piece of shit."

If you can love good food and drink in moderation, then good for you, but there are some gluttonous bastards out there who really love their good food and drink. And love it, and love it, and love it some more, until they've become Jabba the fucking Hutt with legs.

This kind of overindulgence can lead to serious medical conditions, such as fat-piece-of-shit-itis, that will adversely affect one's mobility. So if that's what you want, then by all means, you should do nothing but sit around drinking, watching televsion and playing video games. Or just sit there and be fat. Whatever floats your boat. And then, one day, you'll wake up with a major case of I'm-a-fat-fuck, and you'll be lucky if you can even make it out of bed.

Jesus. Put the turkey leg down and go take a walk, you fat bastard.